Sunday, February 27, 2011
And Now for a Special Announcement
Due to unforseen circumstances that have arisen over the past couple days, this will be the last post I will make on this blog. I will be making a new blog under a yet-to-be-determined address, but I feel that this particular blog, and the accompanying title, have lost something and it's time for a fresh start. So, until then, goodbye.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
When All Else Fails...
...post song lyrics. Here's coming at you from the Beatles. Credit to Lennon-McCartney, please don't sue me Apple Corps.
Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields Forever
Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It's getting hard to be someone but it all works out
It doesn't matter much to me
Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields Forever
No one, I think, is in my tree
I mean it must be high or low
That is, you can't, you know tune in, but it's alright
That is, I think it's not too bad
Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields Forever
Always, ah no sometimes, think it's me
But you know I know when it's a dream
I think a "no" may mean a "yes" but it's all wrong
That is, I think I disagree
Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields Forever
Strawberry Fields Forever
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Let's Take This One From the Top
Okay. I've hinted at in in previous posts, and even flat out said it earlier, but for the past year or so, I've been a closeted Gleek. My friend RJ turned me on to it in November of 2009. I caught two or three episodes and loved it, but then they went on hiatus. Fun shtuff. My schedule didn't really allow for me to watch Glee when it came back on the air, and when the second season started, I had just started work at Target and I usually worked Tuesday nights. Now I don't work Tuesday nights, but I have class. So I still can't watch it at first airing :(
There's really no reason for me to like it. I mean, I can relate to the kids in the show because in high school I was in a group that was low on the totem pole, and I like music, but other than that, there's really no rational reason for me to watch it. But I do. It's one of those things that can't be explained, you know?
But Jenny kinda turned me back onto it last year, especially when she told me aired episodes were on Hulu. Why I hadn't thought of that, I don't know, but I can be a dumdum sometimes, so yeah. And I tried watching a little bit. But I had missed so much I was rather lost.
So what did I do last weekend? Went out and bought the entire first season. And since I've had quite a bit of time on my hands, I've been up to my elbows in Glee for the past week. Already got to where I was when I wasn't able to watch anymore, so from here on out it's uncharted territory. And now I find out that the first part of season 2 is out on dvd too, which I'm still up in the air about bc I kinda want to buy the season as a whole, but that'll be a while. Oh well, I'll figure something out :)
But the lovely thing is, my siblings don't quite get my obsession with it, and they're chastizing me like crazy about it. It's really not fair, they aren't giving it much of a chance. And then I come home from my little excursion to the restaurant on Tuesday at about 7:40, and I find my sister quickly changing channels from Fox to an infomercial. And I made her change it back, and I watched. Don't know if she was watching or what. I think she'd like it, since she's into performing and such, but I'm not going to force it on her. My brother still wants no part of it.
So, that's all I have to say. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I can hear my brother sneaking up behind me with a slushie, surely aimed at my face. So until next time, please remember that I have thoughts too, you know.
Oh yuck, it's cherry.
There's really no reason for me to like it. I mean, I can relate to the kids in the show because in high school I was in a group that was low on the totem pole, and I like music, but other than that, there's really no rational reason for me to watch it. But I do. It's one of those things that can't be explained, you know?
But Jenny kinda turned me back onto it last year, especially when she told me aired episodes were on Hulu. Why I hadn't thought of that, I don't know, but I can be a dumdum sometimes, so yeah. And I tried watching a little bit. But I had missed so much I was rather lost.
So what did I do last weekend? Went out and bought the entire first season. And since I've had quite a bit of time on my hands, I've been up to my elbows in Glee for the past week. Already got to where I was when I wasn't able to watch anymore, so from here on out it's uncharted territory. And now I find out that the first part of season 2 is out on dvd too, which I'm still up in the air about bc I kinda want to buy the season as a whole, but that'll be a while. Oh well, I'll figure something out :)
But the lovely thing is, my siblings don't quite get my obsession with it, and they're chastizing me like crazy about it. It's really not fair, they aren't giving it much of a chance. And then I come home from my little excursion to the restaurant on Tuesday at about 7:40, and I find my sister quickly changing channels from Fox to an infomercial. And I made her change it back, and I watched. Don't know if she was watching or what. I think she'd like it, since she's into performing and such, but I'm not going to force it on her. My brother still wants no part of it.
So, that's all I have to say. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I can hear my brother sneaking up behind me with a slushie, surely aimed at my face. So until next time, please remember that I have thoughts too, you know.
Oh yuck, it's cherry.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
The Calm Before (and After) the Storm
Sheesh. Yesterday was rather taxing. It started out okay, what with classes and all. Lined up like ducks in a row: Accounting, Literature, History. And that's where this story takes off. That's the calm before the storm, because from here my actions set off other things that spiraled out of control.
I was waiting in line to speak to my history professor at the end of class. Needed to give him a paper topic, since we have a paper due in that class before spring break. As I was in line, I noticed a friend of mine stick his head in the door, scan the room, and then leave. Thought that was kind of odd, but I stayed in line and gave my professor my topic. Didn't see him outside the room, so I started walking towards the main building. I soon realized that I was walking right behind him and went to catch up with him when I saw he was on the phone. Then my phone began to ring, and I started laughing to myself. I picked up and he was like, "Hey Gene!" and I said, "Dude, I'm right behind you." Funny awkward moments provided to you by me, your narrator.
This guy didn't mind though. His name's Josh and he's rather laid back. He's a bit older than I am, and he's a philosophy major. Really good listener, this guy, and because he's into philosophy, he usually has an interesting view on things. We decided we should go get lunch together, so he drove us to Jimmy Johns across the street from SWIC. And we just talked for a while, two friends catching up and the like. Nothing wrong with that, right?
Anyway, I had texted my mom asking if I needed to pick anybody up that day. She said no, so I took that as her saying, "No need to hurry, have fun." So we hung out for about 2 hours, and he took me back to my car at about 3:45, and I got home around 4.
When I got in the door, my mom was on the phone with somebody, and my brother was headed out the door to go get his haircut. When she got off the phone, Mom got mad at me because she needed to go get my dad and was running late. Wish she would've told me that before, but I apologized and she left. My sister then called, asking for Mom, telling me that drama tryouts were going to end early and that she could be picked up before 5. I told her how to contact Mom and then texted Mom myself, telling her that my sister would need to be picked up early. Meanwhile, I had a killer headache, so I went upstairs to go take a nap.
At about 5:10 or so, I woke up from my nap to the sound of two people shouting and dishes being slammed into the dishwasher and onto the counter. My room's upstairs, so I have no idea if any dishes were thrown or anything, but it sounded like quite a mess. It was my dad and my brother, fighting over pretty much everything. I guess they were trying to do the dishes while fighting, with very little success. No idea how it started because I was asleep, but the part I caught was that my brother was accusing my dad of being lazy and a slob and expecting the rest of us to do all the work around the house while he just sat around and watched tv all night. He said some other things too, but that was pretty much the main gyst. Dad, meanwhile, was livid. I guess he was pissed about Mom being late to get him because of my lunch thing earlier, and when my brother lit into him for God knows what, he pretty much exploded. Went off on how the three of us kids are ungrateful for everything he does for the family, and how he spends ten hours at the office every day, and how we just sit around and do nothing, and that's why nothing ever gets done around the house, and why we haven't been able to move on from that tornado, and how he was going to just bulldoze everything in the house and then what would we have to complain about. It was fun stuff.
This entire time, I'm hysterical. I'm hiding up in my room, afraid to come out because I've never heard them fight this badly before. I was pretty much a coward, paralyzed by fear and not knowing what to do. I had no idea where my sister was, and Mom was downstairs trying to calm them down, but good luck doing that. A quick temper is one of those things that gets passed down in my dad's family, and it's near impossible to stop once it starts. My dad has it, his dad has it, my brother has it. Even I have it, but not nearly to the degree that they do. 999 times out of 1000 I just get moody and pouty. I try not to let it out, and for the most part I'm successful at that. But I was probably as scared as I've ever been in my life. Another one of those hereditary things is high blood pressure, which I'm sure I'm going to have to deal with at some point, and coupled with my dad's diabetes, I was seriously scared he was going to keel over.
So, in my panic, I sent out an SOS to my friend Kenzie. God bless her. She told me to hang tight while she told Jenny I needed to talk to her, and Jenny helped me figure out what to do. I finally broke out and drove to Burger King and just hunkered down for about an hour. Got back, and Mom and Dad were gone, out to do God knows what in order to help him calm down. My sister seemed okay, but I didn't really say much to her, and my brother was in the basement in his room. At that point, I just went up to my room, where I stayed the rest of the night. Nothing else really happened. Mom and Dad got home and everybody just went to their rooms, not really doing much. I couldn't really sleep, so I spent the next couple hours texting friends. It was pretty trying, but I had no idea what else to do. Finally got to sleep around 11, and even that was sporadic, but I think I'm okay.
How long am I going to be able to keep up with this? I've backed myself into a corner. There isn't a place where I can just relax and be myself, other than maybe my room, and even that's dodgy at times. Tension is everywhere. I'm trying to hold up, but my back is just about broken. Oh, even better, literally, as I'm typing this, Mom's mad at me because she just asked me for the change from my brother's haircut that he apparently gave me yesterday. Yeah, he gave it to me, and told me to buy myself some food with it. Thought it was a nice gesture, so I did. Now I've got to pay the balance. Just great. Screwed over by what I thought was a nice gesture. Little jerk. Gah, I can't type anymore right now. But a thank you again to Josh, Kenzie, Jenny, and RJ for your help yesterday. I have to go. I just wish people would realize that I have thoughts too, you know.
I was waiting in line to speak to my history professor at the end of class. Needed to give him a paper topic, since we have a paper due in that class before spring break. As I was in line, I noticed a friend of mine stick his head in the door, scan the room, and then leave. Thought that was kind of odd, but I stayed in line and gave my professor my topic. Didn't see him outside the room, so I started walking towards the main building. I soon realized that I was walking right behind him and went to catch up with him when I saw he was on the phone. Then my phone began to ring, and I started laughing to myself. I picked up and he was like, "Hey Gene!" and I said, "Dude, I'm right behind you." Funny awkward moments provided to you by me, your narrator.
This guy didn't mind though. His name's Josh and he's rather laid back. He's a bit older than I am, and he's a philosophy major. Really good listener, this guy, and because he's into philosophy, he usually has an interesting view on things. We decided we should go get lunch together, so he drove us to Jimmy Johns across the street from SWIC. And we just talked for a while, two friends catching up and the like. Nothing wrong with that, right?
Anyway, I had texted my mom asking if I needed to pick anybody up that day. She said no, so I took that as her saying, "No need to hurry, have fun." So we hung out for about 2 hours, and he took me back to my car at about 3:45, and I got home around 4.
When I got in the door, my mom was on the phone with somebody, and my brother was headed out the door to go get his haircut. When she got off the phone, Mom got mad at me because she needed to go get my dad and was running late. Wish she would've told me that before, but I apologized and she left. My sister then called, asking for Mom, telling me that drama tryouts were going to end early and that she could be picked up before 5. I told her how to contact Mom and then texted Mom myself, telling her that my sister would need to be picked up early. Meanwhile, I had a killer headache, so I went upstairs to go take a nap.
At about 5:10 or so, I woke up from my nap to the sound of two people shouting and dishes being slammed into the dishwasher and onto the counter. My room's upstairs, so I have no idea if any dishes were thrown or anything, but it sounded like quite a mess. It was my dad and my brother, fighting over pretty much everything. I guess they were trying to do the dishes while fighting, with very little success. No idea how it started because I was asleep, but the part I caught was that my brother was accusing my dad of being lazy and a slob and expecting the rest of us to do all the work around the house while he just sat around and watched tv all night. He said some other things too, but that was pretty much the main gyst. Dad, meanwhile, was livid. I guess he was pissed about Mom being late to get him because of my lunch thing earlier, and when my brother lit into him for God knows what, he pretty much exploded. Went off on how the three of us kids are ungrateful for everything he does for the family, and how he spends ten hours at the office every day, and how we just sit around and do nothing, and that's why nothing ever gets done around the house, and why we haven't been able to move on from that tornado, and how he was going to just bulldoze everything in the house and then what would we have to complain about. It was fun stuff.
This entire time, I'm hysterical. I'm hiding up in my room, afraid to come out because I've never heard them fight this badly before. I was pretty much a coward, paralyzed by fear and not knowing what to do. I had no idea where my sister was, and Mom was downstairs trying to calm them down, but good luck doing that. A quick temper is one of those things that gets passed down in my dad's family, and it's near impossible to stop once it starts. My dad has it, his dad has it, my brother has it. Even I have it, but not nearly to the degree that they do. 999 times out of 1000 I just get moody and pouty. I try not to let it out, and for the most part I'm successful at that. But I was probably as scared as I've ever been in my life. Another one of those hereditary things is high blood pressure, which I'm sure I'm going to have to deal with at some point, and coupled with my dad's diabetes, I was seriously scared he was going to keel over.
So, in my panic, I sent out an SOS to my friend Kenzie. God bless her. She told me to hang tight while she told Jenny I needed to talk to her, and Jenny helped me figure out what to do. I finally broke out and drove to Burger King and just hunkered down for about an hour. Got back, and Mom and Dad were gone, out to do God knows what in order to help him calm down. My sister seemed okay, but I didn't really say much to her, and my brother was in the basement in his room. At that point, I just went up to my room, where I stayed the rest of the night. Nothing else really happened. Mom and Dad got home and everybody just went to their rooms, not really doing much. I couldn't really sleep, so I spent the next couple hours texting friends. It was pretty trying, but I had no idea what else to do. Finally got to sleep around 11, and even that was sporadic, but I think I'm okay.
How long am I going to be able to keep up with this? I've backed myself into a corner. There isn't a place where I can just relax and be myself, other than maybe my room, and even that's dodgy at times. Tension is everywhere. I'm trying to hold up, but my back is just about broken. Oh, even better, literally, as I'm typing this, Mom's mad at me because she just asked me for the change from my brother's haircut that he apparently gave me yesterday. Yeah, he gave it to me, and told me to buy myself some food with it. Thought it was a nice gesture, so I did. Now I've got to pay the balance. Just great. Screwed over by what I thought was a nice gesture. Little jerk. Gah, I can't type anymore right now. But a thank you again to Josh, Kenzie, Jenny, and RJ for your help yesterday. I have to go. I just wish people would realize that I have thoughts too, you know.
Monday, February 7, 2011
A Random Thought for You to Enjoy - The Adventures of Felix W. Mumford
I am bored, and I didn't really do all that much today that's worth putting in a blog, so I'm going to free write a story and post that. I hope you enjoy!
Far away, on the steep rocky cliffs of Whotheheckcares, there sat an old rickety hut, worn by the elements that had crashed against it throughout the years. There was only one occupant of that weatherbeaten shack, one Felix W. Mumford. Mr. Mumford was a retired attorney at law; he had practiced for a good many years, let's say about 40 or so, so that you have a number in your head. But he wasn't a very good lawyer, as the fact that he lived in such a worn-down hut might suggest. In fact, he was known throughout Whotheheckcares as the worst lawyer for miles around. One time, he was in charge of defending a man accused of stealing his neighbor's horse. Mr. Mumford's client had documentation that he was not home on the day the crime occurred, that in fact he was out of town on business for ten days prior to the crime and ten days after. Still, the man was somehow found guilty, thanks to Mr. Mumford's unabashed histronics while examining the man; Mumford essentially badgered the man into admitting the crime by reminding him of an unfortunate incident from his childhood in which the man was dragged through town by a runaway stagecoach, only to result in a horrific crash in which the mayor's wife's cousin's dog's breeder's sister was killed. A mail sack fell on her head and squished it. When Mr. Mumford reminded the man of this unfortunate accident, he admitted stealing the horse, even though (as was stated before) it would have been impossible for him to have stolen the horse. What's more, to add insult to injury, the jury was so irate to learn of the man's involvement in the unfortunate death of that woman all those years ago, they sentenced him to death, and the judge threw him into the ocean to sleep with the fishes. Mr. Mumford was quite proud of himself for the services he provided to Whotheheckcares, because he in fact didn't care much for the man he had essentially just goaded to death. People began to talk, however, and Mr. Mumford soon chose to retire, on account of the fact that nobody would ask him to represent them in court.
Mr. Mumford had been married once before, to a beautiful girl named Florida. They had three beautiful children: Francis, Frances, and Frauncies. But people soon began to make fun of the family, what with Mr. Mumford being a terrible lawyer (and this was years before the aforementioned case), Florida being the name of a state and not of a person, and the three little Mumfords all having near-identical names. It soon became too much for Florida, and so she left Mr. Mumford, taking Francis, Frances, and Frauncies with her. She never attempted to contact him again, as she took a job with the Boeing Corporation, developing a jet engine, and was set for life.
So Mr. Mumford grew old all by himself in that house on the cliffs. And he was quite upset with his life, because nobody seemed to appreciate him at all. But one day an inspiration hit him. He would build himself a boat, and sail away from Whotheheckcares, away from the people who hated him and Florida who had shunned him, and to a new place where a man of his talents and genius would be appreciated. There was a forest not far from Mr. Mumford's house, and so he set about building a sailboat. It took him three months, but he finally did it. And what a beautiful craft she was. He named her New Florida, because he intended to spend time with her and be happy with her, as Florida had been there for him all those years ago.
Finally, Mr. Mumford decided it was time for him to go. He packed all his possessions into his boat and bid farewell to that dismal house he had lived in for all those years. Then he got into the boat and pushed off towards the ocean.
But Mr. Mumford forgot that he lived on a cliff, and that he had built his boat on the cliff, and so when he pushed New Florida off towards the ocean, he pushed her off the cliffs and onto the rocks below. There was a horrendous crash.
I regret to inform you that Felix W. Mumford, retired attorney at law, died in a boating accident, after his boat fell 200 feet from the cliffs of Whotheheckcares onto the rocks below. But there is a moral to be found in his story. If you're ever building a boat, make sure you build it in a place you can safely launch it from.
Well, that was my story. I admit, it's rather bad and rather random, but I was just freewriting, and I do have class in the morning, so I wasn't expecting to write the next Oliver Twist or anything. You might be thinking I'm disturbed and morbid, and this story probably makes me look disturbed and morbid. But please remember, I have thoughts too, you know.
Far away, on the steep rocky cliffs of Whotheheckcares, there sat an old rickety hut, worn by the elements that had crashed against it throughout the years. There was only one occupant of that weatherbeaten shack, one Felix W. Mumford. Mr. Mumford was a retired attorney at law; he had practiced for a good many years, let's say about 40 or so, so that you have a number in your head. But he wasn't a very good lawyer, as the fact that he lived in such a worn-down hut might suggest. In fact, he was known throughout Whotheheckcares as the worst lawyer for miles around. One time, he was in charge of defending a man accused of stealing his neighbor's horse. Mr. Mumford's client had documentation that he was not home on the day the crime occurred, that in fact he was out of town on business for ten days prior to the crime and ten days after. Still, the man was somehow found guilty, thanks to Mr. Mumford's unabashed histronics while examining the man; Mumford essentially badgered the man into admitting the crime by reminding him of an unfortunate incident from his childhood in which the man was dragged through town by a runaway stagecoach, only to result in a horrific crash in which the mayor's wife's cousin's dog's breeder's sister was killed. A mail sack fell on her head and squished it. When Mr. Mumford reminded the man of this unfortunate accident, he admitted stealing the horse, even though (as was stated before) it would have been impossible for him to have stolen the horse. What's more, to add insult to injury, the jury was so irate to learn of the man's involvement in the unfortunate death of that woman all those years ago, they sentenced him to death, and the judge threw him into the ocean to sleep with the fishes. Mr. Mumford was quite proud of himself for the services he provided to Whotheheckcares, because he in fact didn't care much for the man he had essentially just goaded to death. People began to talk, however, and Mr. Mumford soon chose to retire, on account of the fact that nobody would ask him to represent them in court.
Mr. Mumford had been married once before, to a beautiful girl named Florida. They had three beautiful children: Francis, Frances, and Frauncies. But people soon began to make fun of the family, what with Mr. Mumford being a terrible lawyer (and this was years before the aforementioned case), Florida being the name of a state and not of a person, and the three little Mumfords all having near-identical names. It soon became too much for Florida, and so she left Mr. Mumford, taking Francis, Frances, and Frauncies with her. She never attempted to contact him again, as she took a job with the Boeing Corporation, developing a jet engine, and was set for life.
So Mr. Mumford grew old all by himself in that house on the cliffs. And he was quite upset with his life, because nobody seemed to appreciate him at all. But one day an inspiration hit him. He would build himself a boat, and sail away from Whotheheckcares, away from the people who hated him and Florida who had shunned him, and to a new place where a man of his talents and genius would be appreciated. There was a forest not far from Mr. Mumford's house, and so he set about building a sailboat. It took him three months, but he finally did it. And what a beautiful craft she was. He named her New Florida, because he intended to spend time with her and be happy with her, as Florida had been there for him all those years ago.
Finally, Mr. Mumford decided it was time for him to go. He packed all his possessions into his boat and bid farewell to that dismal house he had lived in for all those years. Then he got into the boat and pushed off towards the ocean.
But Mr. Mumford forgot that he lived on a cliff, and that he had built his boat on the cliff, and so when he pushed New Florida off towards the ocean, he pushed her off the cliffs and onto the rocks below. There was a horrendous crash.
I regret to inform you that Felix W. Mumford, retired attorney at law, died in a boating accident, after his boat fell 200 feet from the cliffs of Whotheheckcares onto the rocks below. But there is a moral to be found in his story. If you're ever building a boat, make sure you build it in a place you can safely launch it from.
Well, that was my story. I admit, it's rather bad and rather random, but I was just freewriting, and I do have class in the morning, so I wasn't expecting to write the next Oliver Twist or anything. You might be thinking I'm disturbed and morbid, and this story probably makes me look disturbed and morbid. But please remember, I have thoughts too, you know.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Malls and I Don't Get Along Too Well
Day 1 of fallout from Saturday was an interesting one. For starters, I woke up with this huge headache and sinus pain, which I thought I had mostly gotten over, and I just kinda lay in bed for three hours. Alternated with my eyes being open and shut. And I wasn't really sleeping either. I was in that semi-conscious state where I knew I was in bed, but my mind was processing thoughts like I was dreaming, but I wasn't really dreaming, you know? It was kinda like I was lying there watching a movie in my head, but I was in the movie? I don't really know... I mean, I was sick on Saturday, so that might've contributed to it a little bit, but still, it was an interesting thing. Really, you had to have been there, because my explaining doesn't do it justice.
Finally decided to end that by sitting up, and then I grabbed my guitar and fooled around for about half an hour. I wouldn't say I'm proficient at guitar. I can't fingerpick at all. I do know chords and how to strum though. Mostly Beatles songs, since they're my favorite band, but I do know some other things too. Think I ran through about 7 songs. Played them from memory too, which surprises me because I suck at memorizing things on piano, but it's whatever.
Then I realized that I had planned to go to the mall to buy a Steelers hat, since I was rooting for them in the Super Bowl and I didn't have any Steelers clothes or anything. Plus, I got a $50 gift card to Lids for Christmas, so I thought I'd use that. But my mom told me that my brother had the truck and was already at the mall, and the rest of them were planning on going to the mall, so I should go with them if I wanted to go. So I agreed and got ready. Put my contacts in for the first time in forever. I should really wear those more often... but I digress.
Now, I should mention at this point that I'm not really a mall guy. I mean, sure, there's some nice deals and all, but fashion's not high on my priority list. I like plain clothes, nothing too flashy, and I work at Target so I do most of my shopping there. But I knew Target didn't have Steelers stuff since they only carry stuff for the local teams, and I figured Lids probably would, so I figured, "Why not?" Maybe I could find something else I like while I'm there, or whatever.
So I get in the car and go to the mall. My sister just turned 13 and she's been a bit moody lately, but she was glad today because my parents were buying her some new Converse tennis shoes as a late present. She was talking at a mile a minute about these shoes in the car, and I just couldn't wait to get out so I wouldn't have to hear her go on and on about them. We finally get there, and my parents and sister decide to look in Sears for the shoes first while I go to look for my hat. Why they looked in Sears, I don't know. I mean, Sears is a great place to shop if you're looking for something that's not in a size 1, 3, or 5, or a washing machine, but tennis shoes?
So I get to Lids, and they don't have a Steelers hat on display. I looked for about 5 minutes. There were 3 guys working there, and the entire time I'm in the store, instead of coming to ask if I need help, they're standing at the counter laughing their asses off because one of them did something completely stupid, and he and the other two were laughing at how stupid he was. I walked around the entire bloody store three times, scanning the walls and the racks looking for a stupid Steelers hat, and they didn't even try to help me. Jackasses. So I leave, and I go back to Sears, and my family's not there, and they aren't answering their phones, so I walked around the mall looking for them. After I circled the entire second floor, I remembered why I don't really like going to the mall. It just reminds me of how shallow and superficial people are coming. Loud groups of people blocking the entire walkway, not giving a crap that they're in your way; the music coming from two stores next to each other sounds exactly the same, equally annoying; and the employees of many of the businesses look like they just rolled out of bed, and they treat you like shit because they don't care, they're just there to get paid, to hell with doing any work. It's awesome. I finally got a text from my dad saying where they were, and I just kinda sat on a bench outside the store, not wanting to be there, until they finished paying and we went home.
Or at least, we went to Wal-Mart to get hot dogs for the Super Bowl. Or at least, we tried to get hot dogs, but Wal-Mart was out for some reason or another, so Dad drove us to KFC instead. I usually don't have a problem with KFC, but sometimes I don't want to feel like I'm actually shoving lard into my bloodstream. Luckily though, Dad was nice enough to get some grilled chicken, so I was okay with that. And they gave us an entire bucket full of biscuits for some reason. Really? I like biscuits, but seriously, we now have a ziplock bag with about 20 leftover biscuits on our table. Amazing.
We got home just before kickoff. Didn't have much to root for in the first half. The Packers owned Pittsburgh in the first quarter, and the Steelers didn't do as much as they could have in the second. Then halftime rolled around, and I left. Didn't want to see the Black Eyed Peas. They're okay, but I just didn't really want to see them perform. Maybe it's just a bit of burnout on my part, but I hear their music way too much on the radio, and... yeah.
So I went to Target. It was pretty dead in there, what with everybody at home watching the game. Chewed the fat with my friend Lewis for a while. He's the guy I mentioned I've been talking about getting an apartment with. We talked about things that I'm not going to post here for the moment, but it was a good chat, all in all. Quite... educational. Plus, I played the demo for MLB The Show 2010, a game that's been out for almost a year! Then I wandered around for another five minutes or so before going home.
The rest of the game was okay. I'm not really all that upset that Green Bay won, even though I was rooting against them. I have nothing against the Packers, and they played a great game. Now, if the Patriots were playing and they had won, I would be furious. Not a New England fan. I'm a Rams fan, so I'm sworn to hate the Pats. Fricking cheaters. But that's another story entirely.
Then I decided to watch the episode of Glee that came on after the Super Bowl. Glee is a guilty pleasure of mine. I like music, and I can relate to the characters because in high school I was in a club that was rather low in the hierarchical structure in place in most high schools. I didn't suffer the abuse the kids in the show go through, but I knew I was low on the totem pole. Anyway, my brother and sister chastized the crap out of me for watching tonight, but hey, I haven't been able to watch in a while, and I've got class when it's normally on, so I just told them to screw off. They also were... less than enthusiastic when I told them I bought the first season on DVD. But you know what, it's my money, and I chose to spend it on that. Plus, I couldn't find Friday Night Lights, recommended to me by my friend RJ, who deserves a shout out. FNL is a good show though, from the episodes that I've seen.
And now, to finish my summary of Day 1/(now) Day 2 of the aftermath, it hasn't been terrible. My friend and I haven't talked since I said what I said, but I expected that. I'll just have to play things by ear one day at a time. I'm sorry for what I did, but I'm not sorry that I did it. Just please remember that I'm hurting too, because I have thoughts too you know.
Finally decided to end that by sitting up, and then I grabbed my guitar and fooled around for about half an hour. I wouldn't say I'm proficient at guitar. I can't fingerpick at all. I do know chords and how to strum though. Mostly Beatles songs, since they're my favorite band, but I do know some other things too. Think I ran through about 7 songs. Played them from memory too, which surprises me because I suck at memorizing things on piano, but it's whatever.
Then I realized that I had planned to go to the mall to buy a Steelers hat, since I was rooting for them in the Super Bowl and I didn't have any Steelers clothes or anything. Plus, I got a $50 gift card to Lids for Christmas, so I thought I'd use that. But my mom told me that my brother had the truck and was already at the mall, and the rest of them were planning on going to the mall, so I should go with them if I wanted to go. So I agreed and got ready. Put my contacts in for the first time in forever. I should really wear those more often... but I digress.
Now, I should mention at this point that I'm not really a mall guy. I mean, sure, there's some nice deals and all, but fashion's not high on my priority list. I like plain clothes, nothing too flashy, and I work at Target so I do most of my shopping there. But I knew Target didn't have Steelers stuff since they only carry stuff for the local teams, and I figured Lids probably would, so I figured, "Why not?" Maybe I could find something else I like while I'm there, or whatever.
So I get in the car and go to the mall. My sister just turned 13 and she's been a bit moody lately, but she was glad today because my parents were buying her some new Converse tennis shoes as a late present. She was talking at a mile a minute about these shoes in the car, and I just couldn't wait to get out so I wouldn't have to hear her go on and on about them. We finally get there, and my parents and sister decide to look in Sears for the shoes first while I go to look for my hat. Why they looked in Sears, I don't know. I mean, Sears is a great place to shop if you're looking for something that's not in a size 1, 3, or 5, or a washing machine, but tennis shoes?
So I get to Lids, and they don't have a Steelers hat on display. I looked for about 5 minutes. There were 3 guys working there, and the entire time I'm in the store, instead of coming to ask if I need help, they're standing at the counter laughing their asses off because one of them did something completely stupid, and he and the other two were laughing at how stupid he was. I walked around the entire bloody store three times, scanning the walls and the racks looking for a stupid Steelers hat, and they didn't even try to help me. Jackasses. So I leave, and I go back to Sears, and my family's not there, and they aren't answering their phones, so I walked around the mall looking for them. After I circled the entire second floor, I remembered why I don't really like going to the mall. It just reminds me of how shallow and superficial people are coming. Loud groups of people blocking the entire walkway, not giving a crap that they're in your way; the music coming from two stores next to each other sounds exactly the same, equally annoying; and the employees of many of the businesses look like they just rolled out of bed, and they treat you like shit because they don't care, they're just there to get paid, to hell with doing any work. It's awesome. I finally got a text from my dad saying where they were, and I just kinda sat on a bench outside the store, not wanting to be there, until they finished paying and we went home.
Or at least, we went to Wal-Mart to get hot dogs for the Super Bowl. Or at least, we tried to get hot dogs, but Wal-Mart was out for some reason or another, so Dad drove us to KFC instead. I usually don't have a problem with KFC, but sometimes I don't want to feel like I'm actually shoving lard into my bloodstream. Luckily though, Dad was nice enough to get some grilled chicken, so I was okay with that. And they gave us an entire bucket full of biscuits for some reason. Really? I like biscuits, but seriously, we now have a ziplock bag with about 20 leftover biscuits on our table. Amazing.
We got home just before kickoff. Didn't have much to root for in the first half. The Packers owned Pittsburgh in the first quarter, and the Steelers didn't do as much as they could have in the second. Then halftime rolled around, and I left. Didn't want to see the Black Eyed Peas. They're okay, but I just didn't really want to see them perform. Maybe it's just a bit of burnout on my part, but I hear their music way too much on the radio, and... yeah.
So I went to Target. It was pretty dead in there, what with everybody at home watching the game. Chewed the fat with my friend Lewis for a while. He's the guy I mentioned I've been talking about getting an apartment with. We talked about things that I'm not going to post here for the moment, but it was a good chat, all in all. Quite... educational. Plus, I played the demo for MLB The Show 2010, a game that's been out for almost a year! Then I wandered around for another five minutes or so before going home.
The rest of the game was okay. I'm not really all that upset that Green Bay won, even though I was rooting against them. I have nothing against the Packers, and they played a great game. Now, if the Patriots were playing and they had won, I would be furious. Not a New England fan. I'm a Rams fan, so I'm sworn to hate the Pats. Fricking cheaters. But that's another story entirely.
Then I decided to watch the episode of Glee that came on after the Super Bowl. Glee is a guilty pleasure of mine. I like music, and I can relate to the characters because in high school I was in a club that was rather low in the hierarchical structure in place in most high schools. I didn't suffer the abuse the kids in the show go through, but I knew I was low on the totem pole. Anyway, my brother and sister chastized the crap out of me for watching tonight, but hey, I haven't been able to watch in a while, and I've got class when it's normally on, so I just told them to screw off. They also were... less than enthusiastic when I told them I bought the first season on DVD. But you know what, it's my money, and I chose to spend it on that. Plus, I couldn't find Friday Night Lights, recommended to me by my friend RJ, who deserves a shout out. FNL is a good show though, from the episodes that I've seen.
And now, to finish my summary of Day 1/(now) Day 2 of the aftermath, it hasn't been terrible. My friend and I haven't talked since I said what I said, but I expected that. I'll just have to play things by ear one day at a time. I'm sorry for what I did, but I'm not sorry that I did it. Just please remember that I'm hurting too, because I have thoughts too you know.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
How Much is Too Much, How Far is Too Far?
Let the record show that I am of sound mind and body, and that I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, so help me God.
No, this isn't a will. I don't plan on dying anytime soon, though that's not really my decision. And I don't plan on appearing in court, unless there's some reason for me to be there. That doesn't give any of you license to file some frivolous suit against me to get me into court, though. Time is somewhat important to me, though it doesn't always show. I just want you, the readers, to know that I'm not going to pull any punches in this post; in short, the bullshit meter is on empty, and I'm speaking from the heart.
One thing that might not be apparent all the time is the love I have for the people in my life. My actions over the past month or so have made me look like an opinionated, obnoxious asshole who lacks the tact to know when he needs to keep his mouth shut. I'm not usually the type of person to express how I'm feeling, especially if I'm upset, simply because I don't want people to worry about me. I mean, I believe there are times where I need to wear my heart on my sleeve, and when those times come I wear my heart on my sleeve without batting an eye. But 99% of the time I try to be the guy who sneaks into the picture, completes whatever he needs to do, and slinks back out, trying to avoid the limelight. I try to avoid drama, and actually invite people to tell me their problems, while I just sit there and listen, a neutral third party. This lack of expression, which I try to mask with either extreme giddiness or general indifference, sometimes leads me to internalize my feelings, good and bad, about myself and about others. Once in a while, I pull the stopper out with the intention of letting my feelings drip out, and usually that works, but every once in a while, what I'm thinking and feeling comes out in a torrent of emotions, both good and bad, and I have to struggle for a bit to bottle them up again. This would be one of those times.
My family and my friends are my life. Every night before I go to bed, I thank God for blessing me with such good people in my life. Sure, we all have our faults, but I cannot imagine myself living a happy life without these people. My family... well we tend to grate on each others' nerves sometimes like all families do, but at the end of the day we know we all love each other. The same with my friends. I have no two friends who are exactly alike (though some of them insist that they're twins separated at birth - maybe a later post can be devoted to that particular bromance), and that's a good thing. With every one of my friends, I have different memories, different viewpoints, and different things that make us say, "This is why we're friends."
I know I don't show it often, but I do care very deeply about my friends and their well-being. I could not bear to see any one of them get hurt, especially if I knew there was something I could do to spare them pain. If there was a chance for me to prevent a friend from getting hurt, and I let it happen anyway... I don't see any difference between that situation and a situation where I hurt that friend myself.
Don't get me wrong here, I believe my friends are perfectly capable of making their own decisions, and either reaping the benefits or suffering the consequences of that decision. It is not my job, nor is it my business, to tell anybody what to do. I might tell my friend, "Hey, you're being stupid about ____," or, "Maybe you should think about what you're doing about _____," but I recognize that we're all human beings, capable of choosing what we will and will not do. Above all, I want my friends to be happy. If my friend is happy, I am happy. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
But that doesn't mean I don't worry. Worrying is something I do a lot; in fact I do it too much for my own good. My imagination sometimes runs wild with outrageous scenarios that might happen from the most miniscule things. I can do some very irrational things if I don't keep myself in check. But what I did today... I deemed it rational, and though it's caused quite a bit of grief for me and quite possibly for others as well, I still believe it was justified, though I know I could have handled things much differently.
You see, this is rarely a cut-and-dry issue. What if one friend's pleasure is another friend's pain? What should you do then? What do you do when you see that someone is doing something that bothers another person, a close friend of the happy one? What about if the person who is happy is hiding particular aspects of the thing that makes him/her happy from loved ones because he/she knows they might be uncomfortable knowing those aspects? What do you do if you know your friend could be handling the situation differently, and that his/her current course of action could lead to him/her getting hurt? What if your friend appears blind to how his/her actions are affecting those around him/her? What do you do if you know you aren't the only one worried about the situation, and that somebody should say something, but nobody knows when or how to address that person? What do you do when an opportunity to say something presents itself - do you take that opportunity, knowing that a better opportunity may come at some point in the future, or do you say nothing, knowing that by saying nothing, the situation could become even more complicated?
I care very much about a friend involved in a difficult situation, so I chose to say something today. It didn't go well, and that person is upset, and I don't expect us to hang out or talk much for the foreseeable future. I know I could have handled things differently. Maybe I should have gone to other friends with similar concerns to see if we should talk to the person as a group. But the fact of the matter is I didn't do that, and now I'm hurting inside. I don't want to see this person get hurt, and I pray that won't be the case. But what have I done? Have I overstepped my bounds? Why did I overreach? It's very difficult, and now it's out of my hands. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
No, this isn't a will. I don't plan on dying anytime soon, though that's not really my decision. And I don't plan on appearing in court, unless there's some reason for me to be there. That doesn't give any of you license to file some frivolous suit against me to get me into court, though. Time is somewhat important to me, though it doesn't always show. I just want you, the readers, to know that I'm not going to pull any punches in this post; in short, the bullshit meter is on empty, and I'm speaking from the heart.
One thing that might not be apparent all the time is the love I have for the people in my life. My actions over the past month or so have made me look like an opinionated, obnoxious asshole who lacks the tact to know when he needs to keep his mouth shut. I'm not usually the type of person to express how I'm feeling, especially if I'm upset, simply because I don't want people to worry about me. I mean, I believe there are times where I need to wear my heart on my sleeve, and when those times come I wear my heart on my sleeve without batting an eye. But 99% of the time I try to be the guy who sneaks into the picture, completes whatever he needs to do, and slinks back out, trying to avoid the limelight. I try to avoid drama, and actually invite people to tell me their problems, while I just sit there and listen, a neutral third party. This lack of expression, which I try to mask with either extreme giddiness or general indifference, sometimes leads me to internalize my feelings, good and bad, about myself and about others. Once in a while, I pull the stopper out with the intention of letting my feelings drip out, and usually that works, but every once in a while, what I'm thinking and feeling comes out in a torrent of emotions, both good and bad, and I have to struggle for a bit to bottle them up again. This would be one of those times.
My family and my friends are my life. Every night before I go to bed, I thank God for blessing me with such good people in my life. Sure, we all have our faults, but I cannot imagine myself living a happy life without these people. My family... well we tend to grate on each others' nerves sometimes like all families do, but at the end of the day we know we all love each other. The same with my friends. I have no two friends who are exactly alike (though some of them insist that they're twins separated at birth - maybe a later post can be devoted to that particular bromance), and that's a good thing. With every one of my friends, I have different memories, different viewpoints, and different things that make us say, "This is why we're friends."
I know I don't show it often, but I do care very deeply about my friends and their well-being. I could not bear to see any one of them get hurt, especially if I knew there was something I could do to spare them pain. If there was a chance for me to prevent a friend from getting hurt, and I let it happen anyway... I don't see any difference between that situation and a situation where I hurt that friend myself.
Don't get me wrong here, I believe my friends are perfectly capable of making their own decisions, and either reaping the benefits or suffering the consequences of that decision. It is not my job, nor is it my business, to tell anybody what to do. I might tell my friend, "Hey, you're being stupid about ____," or, "Maybe you should think about what you're doing about _____," but I recognize that we're all human beings, capable of choosing what we will and will not do. Above all, I want my friends to be happy. If my friend is happy, I am happy. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
But that doesn't mean I don't worry. Worrying is something I do a lot; in fact I do it too much for my own good. My imagination sometimes runs wild with outrageous scenarios that might happen from the most miniscule things. I can do some very irrational things if I don't keep myself in check. But what I did today... I deemed it rational, and though it's caused quite a bit of grief for me and quite possibly for others as well, I still believe it was justified, though I know I could have handled things much differently.
You see, this is rarely a cut-and-dry issue. What if one friend's pleasure is another friend's pain? What should you do then? What do you do when you see that someone is doing something that bothers another person, a close friend of the happy one? What about if the person who is happy is hiding particular aspects of the thing that makes him/her happy from loved ones because he/she knows they might be uncomfortable knowing those aspects? What do you do if you know your friend could be handling the situation differently, and that his/her current course of action could lead to him/her getting hurt? What if your friend appears blind to how his/her actions are affecting those around him/her? What do you do if you know you aren't the only one worried about the situation, and that somebody should say something, but nobody knows when or how to address that person? What do you do when an opportunity to say something presents itself - do you take that opportunity, knowing that a better opportunity may come at some point in the future, or do you say nothing, knowing that by saying nothing, the situation could become even more complicated?
I care very much about a friend involved in a difficult situation, so I chose to say something today. It didn't go well, and that person is upset, and I don't expect us to hang out or talk much for the foreseeable future. I know I could have handled things differently. Maybe I should have gone to other friends with similar concerns to see if we should talk to the person as a group. But the fact of the matter is I didn't do that, and now I'm hurting inside. I don't want to see this person get hurt, and I pray that won't be the case. But what have I done? Have I overstepped my bounds? Why did I overreach? It's very difficult, and now it's out of my hands. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Friday, February 4, 2011
How to Succeed at Bowling Without Really Trying
Tonight I went bowling with a group of work friends. There were supposed to be six of us, but we had a couple people drop out at the last minute, so only four of us could make it: me, Kristen, Jenny, and Mike, Jenny's boyfriend. For those of you who have read my previous posts (not very many of you, I would think), I'll fill in some blanks here. Jenny's the girl from the fitting room a couple posts back, and Kristen's her bff.
Anyway, I got the text to go to the bowling alley at about 9 tonight, so I headed out. I got there and without thinking, turned into the part of the parking lot covered in ice from the storm we had this week. Not my best decision ever. I tried getting into a parking space, but I get stuck in the ice. I'm driving my dad's Silverado that's almost 20 years old, and the thing doesn't have 4-wheel drive. Awesome. I call up my friends. We tried pushing the thing out, but it wasn't working, so we just decided to leave it for the time being. I called my dad, who was picking my mom up from work. He said there was some fertilizer in the trunk that I could probably use to get some traction. We went out and tried it, and the truck moved a bit, but not much. Then this guy drives by and says he has a tow cable that we can try to use. Turns out his "cable" was a latching strap, but it was better than nothing. The guy was probably a bit drunk, but he and his friends tried to help anyways. After a couple attempts, we were able to get the truck out, and I tried parking again.
By this time, Mike, Jenny, and Kristen were trying to help another driver who got stuck in the parking lot. I thought I should help, so I manuevered my car into another parking space and got out to help. The truck was slanted at an angle and pretty close to another car, but I figured I was ok. We helped the guy, and then I went back to reposition my car. Problem was, I was stuck again, and to make matters worse, the lady whose car was next to me came out and started complaining about not being able to leave. Then she went inside and started complaining to the manager, and so he sent somebody out to try to see how to make everything work. The lady had plenty of room to go without hitting me if she would just back out straight and then turn, but she wouldn't hear it. Finally, they convinced her that she could do it, and she (unhappily, I might add), went on her merry way. Fun stuff.
Then one of the maintenance guys went out to try to help me. We went through two buckets of rock salt trying to get the stupid thing to move, until finally I had enough room where I could just gun the engine and jump over the curb and into the street. I decided it would probably be best if I parked across the street, seeing as how that lot was less crowded and had less ice.
Finally, about an hour after we got there, we got down to bowling. The manager was nice enough to give us three games for the price of two, I guess in part to make up for the past hour. I'm not complaining. It was a lot of fun. I'm not that good at bowling, but I think I had a respectable day. I was last in our first game, but I broke triple digits in the other two, and I actually won the last game. Kristen had told everybody she would win all three games, so it felt good to prove her wrong. Of course, the others will say that I won because we had all agreed to not try in the third game, and nobody really did try. I guess that proves that I'm just better at not trying than the rest of them :) It's not my fault I bowled straight at the 1 pin most of the time in the last game; I really had no idea what I was doing! And, at least I didn't lose my bowling ball on my backswing multiple times (Jenny), I didn't fall down while bowling (Jenny and Kristen), and I didn't have a fault all night (all three of them, though Kristen cheated Mike into fouling on the last frame lol).
All in all it was a pretty good night. So that's all I have. Remember, I have thoughts too you know :)
Anyway, I got the text to go to the bowling alley at about 9 tonight, so I headed out. I got there and without thinking, turned into the part of the parking lot covered in ice from the storm we had this week. Not my best decision ever. I tried getting into a parking space, but I get stuck in the ice. I'm driving my dad's Silverado that's almost 20 years old, and the thing doesn't have 4-wheel drive. Awesome. I call up my friends. We tried pushing the thing out, but it wasn't working, so we just decided to leave it for the time being. I called my dad, who was picking my mom up from work. He said there was some fertilizer in the trunk that I could probably use to get some traction. We went out and tried it, and the truck moved a bit, but not much. Then this guy drives by and says he has a tow cable that we can try to use. Turns out his "cable" was a latching strap, but it was better than nothing. The guy was probably a bit drunk, but he and his friends tried to help anyways. After a couple attempts, we were able to get the truck out, and I tried parking again.
By this time, Mike, Jenny, and Kristen were trying to help another driver who got stuck in the parking lot. I thought I should help, so I manuevered my car into another parking space and got out to help. The truck was slanted at an angle and pretty close to another car, but I figured I was ok. We helped the guy, and then I went back to reposition my car. Problem was, I was stuck again, and to make matters worse, the lady whose car was next to me came out and started complaining about not being able to leave. Then she went inside and started complaining to the manager, and so he sent somebody out to try to see how to make everything work. The lady had plenty of room to go without hitting me if she would just back out straight and then turn, but she wouldn't hear it. Finally, they convinced her that she could do it, and she (unhappily, I might add), went on her merry way. Fun stuff.
Then one of the maintenance guys went out to try to help me. We went through two buckets of rock salt trying to get the stupid thing to move, until finally I had enough room where I could just gun the engine and jump over the curb and into the street. I decided it would probably be best if I parked across the street, seeing as how that lot was less crowded and had less ice.
Finally, about an hour after we got there, we got down to bowling. The manager was nice enough to give us three games for the price of two, I guess in part to make up for the past hour. I'm not complaining. It was a lot of fun. I'm not that good at bowling, but I think I had a respectable day. I was last in our first game, but I broke triple digits in the other two, and I actually won the last game. Kristen had told everybody she would win all three games, so it felt good to prove her wrong. Of course, the others will say that I won because we had all agreed to not try in the third game, and nobody really did try. I guess that proves that I'm just better at not trying than the rest of them :) It's not my fault I bowled straight at the 1 pin most of the time in the last game; I really had no idea what I was doing! And, at least I didn't lose my bowling ball on my backswing multiple times (Jenny), I didn't fall down while bowling (Jenny and Kristen), and I didn't have a fault all night (all three of them, though Kristen cheated Mike into fouling on the last frame lol).
All in all it was a pretty good night. So that's all I have. Remember, I have thoughts too you know :)
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